Globemaking

Maybe the best offline project of my career in nonsense: globes.

Globemaking is not a hobby. It isn't even a real word. I got curious about it not too long ago and decided to give it a go. There's actually very little published about how to make globes, which (of course) made it irresistible.

Globe #1: not shown. This was my introduction to gluing paper onto a ball. Not much to see.

Globe #2: Callisto

Behold! The second-ugliest moon in the solar system:

There is little chance of it being confused with the real thing:

• Dreadful algebra? Check.
• Dreadful geometry? Check.
• Kitchen wrecked? Check.
• Fussiness Index: +321 (that's pretty darn fussy)

As is often the case, I'll set off to see if I can do something at all, then return to see if I can do it well. The Callisto globe is a little over five inches across and took about two weeks to do. That's two weeks spent making something that's entirely unimpressive. Everyone has seen a globe by now.

Globe #3: Europa

A proper stand lends instant credibility.

This globe yielded the most information (which means it has the most problems). It's tough to fast-track a hobby so you can become adept without wasting years to gain actual experience. I've decided to take one more crack at it, then I'm done. Interesting tidbits from this round:

• Sealants with high acetone content mobilize/diffuse yellow and cyan laser printer toner (turning the whole thing green). Xylene and toluene are okay.
• Decoupage glue takes a week or two to completely dry, during which time it (and the paper substrate) continue to shrink. Printing cross-grain and letting everything rest for a week before assembly should minimize gaps.
• My geometry was wrong. Regular sinusoidal gores don't align around the poles. In another week I should be able to produce a transverse Mercator projection. I can just see you shaking your head, bemused that I missed something so obvious.

So globe #4 will appear in a month or two. I'm bored with this, but I don't think I'll be able to let it go until I like the results.